Power

I haven't written or taken pictures for a while. It's mostly because there is a new light to my career and life is getting busy now. I am moving to the City of Power, going to my dream place, away from the rain. The mixed feelings of excitement, anxiety, hope, paranoia, and uncertainty are occupying me, but I feel good in general.

A lot to update about my love life, or nothing to update. It feels pretty good to be asexual; I have much less pressure now as long as I don't hold any feelings toward any men. But guess what? A few of my exes suddenly popped into my life again, and one of them is someone I have not spoken/emailed to for at least 3 years. However, of course, I have no feelings for them at all. There were a few moments when I wonder what it would feel like if I started to have those infatuations and flirty stuff with them, but I could always manage to quickly jump out of those fantasies and feel apathetic and asexual again.

I shall thank these people for ruining my decade-long fantasies about romance and showing me what human beings really are. Thank you for making me so jaded, pessimistic about love, and stop watching romantic comedies. My current career plan is to pursue as much power and money as possible for the rest of my life. If I happen not to have kids before my menopause, then I will just have a few more puppies. Sigh. There are so many dreams in life and I have the ability to pursue only one of them, and I choose my career because it constantly rewards me, and I am good at it.

Last note, Ivan has disappeared from any forms of contact with me. He is back to his hometown. That's all I know. Maybe he's busy f*cking some chicks, or maybe he's getting married. I should stop thinking. They're all dead to me.