Please remember me.

My biggest fear has always been being forgotten by people I care about, being neglected, being abandoned.

Tonight I had a weird bout of emotional meltdown simply because it was Saturday night and I never heard from Mars, the guy I went on a date with yesterday. He texted me briefly in the afternoon when he was at his friend's party, and never again after that. There could be many reasons, but I just felt so strongly that I had to cry. People think I'm crazy but I could feel that he was with someone, possibly a woman. Weird emotional meltdowns without a clear reason like this have happened before when Sean, Cato, Alex, Ken, Jes, Richard, and everyone else were shutting down and about to leave me.

So I'm assuming Mars will be doing the same soon. But if I'm wrong this time, here's what I want to say to him:

I felt really nervous, even panicked, when I was about to meet you. It's been a while since someone has craved to meet me or date me. What makes you even more special than those other guys who had an instant connection with me is that you said upfront at the beginning that you want to settle down with someone, so I believe we're on the same page. I really hope this could work because I want to travel with you; we can go to the mountains, the beach, or even Bali or Iceland. We can see the northern lights together; we can start a simple, content life. I'm saying all this not because I know you're the one; in fact, I have no clue at all. It's just that now I have learned that relationships are a lot of work. I'm willing to make this work and be just a little girl, and I hope you want the same.

If Mars is disappearing soon, I just hope that someone can remember me. Ken, can you please remember me? Or Eric? Or simply, someone? Am I really that easily forgotten?