They deserve to be seen.

Last night I heard my neighbors having sex at 3 o'clock. Then I began to think about some men. In fact, just Eric and Ken.

Ken said he'd like to catch up in early November and it's already early November, but I still haven't heard a word from him. I don't know if I should ask him out again for closure, but I really don't like to take the initiative. If he clarifies things with me via texts, chats, or a phone call, I'd feel extremely upset because he wouldn't be able to see my face and my tears, and my tears deserve to be seen.

And Eric, I just want him to keep his promise. I remember his face on webcam when he said "OK" after I told him to just come visit me. I believe he will keep his words, although I fear he won't. I don't know how to ask him because I'm afraid of a negative answer. If he's really coming to visit me, he would have let me know his itinerary and logistics. I haven't heard from him since he said OK three weeks ago. I'm so afraid...

My tears deserve to be seen. I've cried too many tears alone in the dark, without anyone in the world seeing or knowing them.