Perfection.

A couple of nights ago, JJ came to my place for dinner. Somehow my amazing spicy red hot food made him reluctant to leave my apartment. We hung out till almost 2 a.m. We were close to each other now. He talks to me and calls me every day, yet he talks to his long-distance girlfriend only once per week.

That night I felt like kissing him, but of course nothing happened. He fell asleep next to me, and then I was wondering. Wondering if I was good enough for him, wondering if he is worthwhile. He is perfect, everybody loves him. I am better than him in some ways, but he's better than me in even more ways. Oh, especially his family background, it is his background that intimidates me. His family is so rich and powerful and I just don't think my family background would be a good match.

Again, I am retreating. It's always much easier to give up than to pursue a relationship. Men do love my food though.