Each day

Each day goes by really fast. I was completely drained on Saturday and slept for 12 hours. Then I had to get up to celebrate Halloween with the kids because it’s one of the few social outings they can have. Then we had dinner, came home and shower, and passed out. Then the day is over.

Today I got up at 9:30, got ready for a nice lunch with Jinu. After lunch we decided to do the coastal scenic drive. It was rainy and cold in the mountains. Then we went shopping at Costco. We had lots of fun and talked about everything—birth families, relationships, therapy, work, etc. we talked nonstop. He thinks I’m the most unique person he’s met and he’s not the only one. We basically hung out for 8 hours straight. After we got home, I showered the kid, tucked them in bed, and took a bath myself.

Then the day is over. I sleep and I go to work tomorrow. Each day goes by so fast in busyness. Then it’s almost the time I get out the Christmas tree. Do I feel lonely? Only late at night before bedtime. This is the moment when I want to be held the most. Also occasionally when I’ve been bullied by my own family or strangers for my son’s behaviors, I’d want to be held so badly. When I’m scared.